Friday, January 16, 2009


I went to the bank in Chinatown today. After battling my way through the cold & tourists buying Chanels and Rolexes, I found my branch bumping with everyone cashing their checks from payday. I walk up to the table to fill out my deposit slip and this guy next to me is using the wrong pen!

Ok- Standard desk: you have your desk, your stacks of deposit & withdrawal slips, the little plastic thingy that tells you the date, and your two pens on chains.

This man is taking his sweet old time on the left side of the desk with the pen from the right side (MY SIDE) of the desk. So not to be rude, I stand and I wait. The longer I stand waiting for the pen, the more I think... "He's doing this on purpose!". By the time he's actually done filling out his slip, I swear to all things HSBC - he is boxing me out.
(BTW - the other pen was not out of ink, I checked.)

Though that was the end of the pen ficaso, the bank adventure does not end there, how could it? Being in a hurry, I scribble my name on the back of my check. "Ashly R Th" was pretty much all I got out. I've gotten in a habit of leaving the "e" out of my first name... aaaaand about 5 or 6 letters of the back of my last. I acredit this to all the sushi deliveries I've signed for in the past year.

Finally at the front of the line (yay! *little party in my head*)I walk up to the teller at the window and hand her my check & slip. So she's typing and looking at me, and typing and looking. And then she looks at my signature on my check and then looks at me. And THEN she spins her monitor around to face me and says, "this doesn't look like your signature." So I take a look at her computer... Well of course it doesn't numbskull, A.) I'm in a hurry so I wrote fast, no thanks to the Pen-Nazi and 2.) That signature on your screen is from EIGHTH GRADE!!!

You would think the banks would update their info every 10 years or so. I was surprised they didn't still have my employer down as Joe Sundae's.

So the teller hands me a pen and a blank sheet of paper and asks me to rewrite my signature. So I do it again, keeping in mind that I'm 13 years old, and hand it back to her. She goes "Mm... no." What?! WHAT! I have never felt so helpless. I think I actually said under my breath, "Well I wrote fast because I was in a hur..". After handing over my ID, bank card, social security card, wallet, keys, first born child; she finally deposits my check. I really hope she's not that stubborn the next time a stranger wants to put money in my account.


1 comment:

  1. "" BAH-HAHA! I imagine you displayed the patience of a saint. ;)